Most women need to feel at least mildly desperate before they are willing to look at their life and make the necessary changes. A hundred forms of unhappiness can ensue, but people will keep on doing what they do, and they’ll continue to get what they get until they’ve had enough. Sadly, for some, the day of reckoning never comes.
This is especially true for women and alcohol. When it comes to dating—often the two shouldn’t be mixed. Women want to find the man/woman of their dreams, but if you’re twenty-five or older, the chances of that happening in a bar are slim and none. Women want the dream wedding, but they don’t want to look at the fact that a decent partner with a promising future is probably not hanging out in a bar. The man of your dreams won’t be interested in the girl who drinks too much, and who on the first date shoves her tongue down his throat and demands he come upstairs. Sorry to be so blunt, but this is what I’m hearing from some very eligible and downright decent catches.
I’ve talked to some cool eligible men in their late twenties, and they are dumbfounded by the dating scene. In fact, their terrified of dating. A good portion of the men say they hate how the girl starts planning future meet-the-parent outings before dessert has been served.
Lose the Booze
Ladies, where’s your self-respect? Too often that sense of self-respect goes out the window after the third beer or third glass of wine. To some prospects, a woman who has to drink like that is a scary proposition. The desperation in her voice comes out. The biological clock ticks louder in her ear, and the prospect senses all that desperation and flees into the night never to be seen again.
It’s never too late to live and drink mindfully. Mindfulness is not just a buzz word. It has to be lived if you want to see results.
If you want a long-term partnership, lose the booze. The only thing worse than a drunk man is a drunk woman. Believe me, any girl who drinks like a lush will only attract a person who drinks too much too. Drinking couples are not the best recipe for a long-term, stable relationship—actually it’s a nightmare. How do I know? Well I got married when I was way too young for all the wrong reasons, and yes, that marriage was a disaster. Alcohol was the third wheel in all of the drama. I made every mistake a girl can make: I was dishonest about why I planned to marry, (I needed a roommate). My motives had little to do with love ( I needed a roommate ), and I shrugged off all the red flags. Wrong move.
There are young women who would never think to give up the wine, but if they did decide to give it a try, they might be shocked to learn that they can’t. Drinking has become a staple in our culture, but few women want to think it’s the one thing holding them back from finding and living the life of their dreams.
We gravitate to people who are similar to us. If you find that you’re not finding the right fish, you gotta go to another pond—and hopefully one that isn’t stocked with alcohol.